Friday, October 5, 2012

My first review

 Writing is hard. Really, it is. I like to think of myself as a strong person but when I quit my job to jump into the writing world I knew it was going to be hard. My friends were supportive but in a general sense. I didn't make too big a deal about it and they know I'm a strong person. So it's been lots of 'good luck to ya' and 'how's the writing going?', but no one seems overly worried about me. (Except my mother, but she always worries)

But I do have my moments of doubt. Writing takes place in a vacuum and we are the least qualified to judge our own work. I think my writing is good. I'm confident I'm improving. I've definitely learned a ton. I believe I will eventually succeed. But I don't know. Not for sure. I just try to hold onto my confidence in myself and keep moving forward. So far it's mostly working.

At the moment I am struggling with my Work In Progess. I love the story. I think I've found the voice. But my idea is not what it needs to be. It's not marketable, not for a first time author. I don't think I can sell it as it is. But I can change it. I know how to make it into what other people want. It would still be good. In fact, in many ways it would be better. I have to try to balance the confidence in myself with a practical knowledge of the rest of the world I have to deal with. We can't both always be right.

All of this being up inside my head has made it hard to write. I can see where to go, even how to get there, but I resist taking the first step. It's hard to commit when the outcome is so unknown.

When your own faith falters, sometimes it takes the faith of another to keep you up. Sometimes it's the smallest thing from a random source that tells you what you need to hear. I got my first review on Smashwords for my free novella. Someone liked my story (someone I don't know). And they took the time to tell me so.

Writing is hard. Bring it on.

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