The importance of word choice

"Out of the way, lard-ass."

What do you think of that line? Completely out of context, who do you think would say something like that? Who would it be directed at? What does it tell you about the world and place where it was uttered?

That's a line from the opening scene of a new project I've started working on. The line itself is not an important one - it's definitely not the opener. It comes a couple pages in and has nothing to do with the plot. The speaker is a faceless person passing through, never named and totally irrelevant. But to a writer, every little word can seem like a pivotal moment that will make or break your story. We obsess over our choices, try a million different options and combinations, and can justify exactly why we ended up with the phrasing we did while the reader skims past it to get to the good stuff.

I thought I would break down how and why I ended up with that particular line and that particular insult. Writing this out forced me to really examine the process and I found it fascinating. Hopefully you will too.

I wrote the line the way most good lines come - it was in the moment and I didn't think twice about it. But afterwards I went back to consider it in more detail. I lengthened it, I changed the wording, I tried different insults. But in the end I stuck with what felt right. Those are the words that would come out of the character's mouth (even if that character is completely unknown to me). Here's why:

First, the setting. The story takes place in modern-day Northern California. Now, I know when most people think 'California' they think of Southern California. Warm weather, sunny beaches, people everywhere and everything popular and trendy. but Northern California is an entirely different beast. It's wet and cool. It's rural. It has much more in common with the Oregon coast and the people are quite similar to those I grew up with in a small midwestern farm town. I wanted to help draw that distinction right up front.

The scene is at a high school - one kid talking to another. He's trying to get to class on time and someone's in his way. It's a public place where teachers might possibly overhear, so the insult is going to be a mild one. Something that might get the speaker a reprimand but no real punishment. My main character is on the receiving end of the insult and she's a bit of an outsider. She doesn't fit in to any particular clique and is recovering from a traumatic accident that's left her a little shell-shocked. She sees everyone else continuing on with their lives while she's stuck in time. So 'out of the way' works on many levels.

The boy who casually throws the insult her way is part of the majority at the school. A white kid with a bunch of white friends who thinks sports are the only important part of school and life is about drinking beer and having fun with your friends. While my character is half Hispanic she's third generation American and passes for white, as opposed to the small but noticeable transitory immigrant farmer population that comes and goes in the school. She's lived there all her life and the locals view her as one of their own, if not necessarily a friend. The insult wouldn't have any racial overtones.

But she is a large girl. Normally strong and stocky, the accident has left her out of shape and she feels even more homely and awkward as a result. At the same time, she's been picked on for her looks for her whole life and one more insult goes completely without notice. She doesn't pay any attention to the words or the speaker since he isn't at all important. But I wanted to work in the type of thing she faces on a daily basis.

'Lard-ass' seems appropriately insulting and insensitive and does help create a proper picture of the character before much description has been given. It's also a rather lame insult. It doesn't scream cool teens - which these kids definitely are not.

Again, this isn't an important line. It quickly flies past the main character and she doesn't even consider who said it. I expect the reader will do the same. But it is the sum of all these little words, the ones that don't seem to matter, that make a story that's compelling and draws the reader into a world. It's easy to tell someone what happened. It takes a lot more to immerse them and let them feel it. As writers we strive for the latter. Sometimes it flows out effortlessly, sometimes we spend hours to get it right. The important thing is that we care. If we don't, no one else will.

"Out of the way, lard-ass."

Constructive Procranstination

Procrastinating is inevitable. Not just among writers, but we seem to have elevated it to a higher level, even giving it a formidable name: Writer's Block. the fact that it seems to affect almost everyone and is such a staple in the artistic process makes me think it's more than the common 'I can't find the motivation to do this' which plagues everyone in the mundane details of life. I think it's actually an integral part of the creative process.

To create, our minds work on more than the conscious level. You can force yourself to sit in the chair and type, but that doesn't necessarily lead to creativity. We need to pull from our vast subconscious; we need to have a well of inspiration from which to draw.

But this is NOT an attempt to justify laziness or give anyone (especially me) an excuse to get out of working. If you want to succeed at anything, you need to be productive. Sometimes that means sitting your butt in a chair and starting to write even when you have nothing to give. It's surprising how often putting words on paper allows the mind to wander, to relax and find the hidden reserves waiting there to fill your quill. There's a reason that successful writers so frequently talk about writing every day, whether you feel like it or not.

Sometimes that works for me; sometimes not. However, as an aspiring author there is a lot more to success than mere writing, and that's where I've found the secret to constructive procrastination. When I lack the inspiration to create stories and characters, I turn to other endeavors. I edit past writing. I read - not just for pleasure but to learn from others about the craft of writing. I update my website. I research agents. I design book covers or review financials. There are so many aspects to being a writer these days that it's hard for me to imagine you can't summon the requisite energy to perform at least one of the tasks.

We all have so little time to get so much done. As a planner, I can come up a schedule and know how much time each little thing should take and the proper order to do them all in. I can block out time in my mornings and clear my calendar for a weekend. I can even set deadlines. But even my regimented mind rebels against such boundaries. If I give myself enough flexibility to let myself work on what inspires me in that moment I work much more productively, meaning I accomplish more over a given time span. Sometimes I blow past the artificial deadlines I set. Sometimes I feel like I have an unending list of next projects that grows faster than I complete them. But by using my procrastination time wisely I make the best use of my limited resources and prepare myself to do my best writing when the time comes.

Is realism a good ting?

from headdudebob on Flickr

My book Synthesis is a work of fiction. More particularly, it's science fiction. Not only is the story made up, but it has aliens, technology, and false history - things that don't exist and never did. But in every aspect of the story I tried to make it as realistic as possible. More importantly, I tried to make the characters real people. Not in the sense that they are modeled after actual, living people. But that they act and behave the way people really do. Therein lies my question: is realism a good thing?

Personally, I prefer realism in my science fiction. I know warp drives aren't possible yet, but they could be developed. Aliens might have visited our planet, and our government probably would want to cover that up and use any advanced technology they acquired for nefarious purposes. I want the basis for the story to be believable even if a little fantastical. When the science or plot get too far disconnected from reality (why do governments always use their best technology to turn teenagers into super-agent killing machines?) then it's harder for me to lose myself in that alternate world.

The same goes for people, but here's where I've run into difficulty. People are imperfect. They tend to be wrapped up in their own world and problems and don't see the big picture. They whine and complain, teenagers more than anyone. (at least, I know I whined a lot, complaining about all the things in life I didn't have control over). When people are taken out of their normal routine they generally flail for a bit before they can adjust, and they don't like it.

You see, my main character Emily whines a bit. She doesn't start out completely happy and satisfied with her life. When bad things happen she doesn't like it and lets the world know. She's passive. When things beyond her understanding start happening, she's lost and confused and relies upon others to take care of her. To use the parlance, she lacks agency. That's how I think most people are and what they would do.

At the same time, she does what's necessary to survive and tries to help others when she can (though she whines a bit while doing it). As the story progresses, so does Emily. She starts to figure things out. She tries to take control and make decisions for herself. She even risks her own life when she's given the chance to sit it out and let others do the work. Truth be told, she still complains a bit that life's unfair. But in the end, I find that willingness to be heroic while not feeling like a hero the essence of what her character arc is all about. If she got there sooner it wouldn't be as worthwhile a journey.

But I get feedback, especially from those who just read the first chapter, that Emily doesn't kick ass enough. She's not a Strong Female Character. They hate it when teenagers are depicted as whiny. How come the little teenage girl has to depend upon the strong men around her to do all the heavy lifting? Reality, that's why.

I know there's always a balance and everyone will have their own viewpoint and interpretation. But for me realism is good. Maybe it will be harder to sell a story that has a character who isn't perfect, who doesn't get things right at the start and isn't happy to be on her adventure. Maybe readers do want superhero characters who take charge right away and control their own fate. But that's not my story; it's not what I want to write. I've decided I'm happy with the reality I've created, the one that mirrors the world I see. That's what's most important to me.

I've got good muse and bad muse...

The theme for this month's Absolute Write blog chain is Who is your Muse? Unfortunately, there seems to be a lack of muses since no one else signed up for the chain. I guess that makes it simply a single link, or circle. But it's a good excuse to talk a bit about where I get my inspiration.

I actually spoke a little about this recently, discussing inspiration from dreams. But muse is a little broader concept, it's the source of knowledge, the container of the story who not only inspires an artist to create but fills their well with the ink. In that light, my muse, everyone's muse, is really the life you've chosen to live.

As a writer, my stories come from my experiences, which often include the many stories I've read, heard, or seen. All those books and movies get jumbled up in my head, then filtered through my own thoughts and actions, and come out in a form that's somewhat universal but still wholly original.

While some might say the inspiration comes from the outside, I think it's the other way around. The inspiration, the urge to create a story and populate it with people you wish existed, comes from within. It's a basic human need to want to control our world.

What comes from the outside are the pieces - the tropes and symbols that we use to build our make-believe world in a way that others can relate to. These legos of life-bits come in all shapes and sizes, and quite often we get excited when we find exactly what we need, or a strange and unique piece sets our mind on a new path towards discovery. But the inspiration? The desire to play in the first place? That's an essential part of our character.

I don't think it's arrogant to say that I'm my own muse. I write for myself first. I've been making up stories since before I can remember. I find plenty of beauty and strangeness and darkness in the world to build with, but I'm inspired to write by the joy it gives me.

Editing: from self-help to professional grade

If you want to be a writer, you've gotta edit. In fact, I'd say editing is what makes or breaks a writer most of the time - what separates the many people who put words down on the page from those who do so as a craft and work of art. It's through editing that our stories become consistent and compelling, our words beautiful and moving (or simply legible). It's necessary. So how do you do it?

There's lots of ways to edit and it's really a continuum, from the editing we do in our head as we type, to a quick read-through we ask of our spouse, to days and months of painstaking labor, pouring over every single word and phrase to find the perfect pairings. (I talked a little about my own process here). And there are different levels of editing, from big picture developmental editing to proofreading for typos and grammar. Knowing where and when to use your resources is essential. I'm going to break it down into three general categories: self-editing, editing from friends, and professional editing. Each has its place, and the more the merrier.

Self-Editing

Maybe some folks can write down a story and have it come out exactly as they want it, but not your average writer. Most of us start with a rough draft, a bunch of words that contain the ideas we want to express, but lacking in clarity, continuity, and completeness. It takes a second pass, then a third or fourth, possibly many more, to polish up that rough gem and bring out the true beauty that lies within. But how?

There are actually a lot of ways to self-edit, and different things work for different people, but it's best to understand up front the limitations to the practice. You can never be the perfect editor for your own work because you are too close to it. You know the idea beneath it, your brain fills in any blanks on the page and gaps in the logic. You don't even need to read the text to follow what's happening. Try as you might, you will never see your work through the eyes of a stranger which is ultimately the whole point of editing - to make everything suitable for the reader who comes upon your words for the first time.

One of the things we tend to be the worst at is the big picture. When you read your own work for a second time, you already know the ending - and the middle and the backstory that isn't even on the page. It can be really hard to get a sense of how things fit together for the reader and whether it actually makes sense. What has worked well for me is to write a one-sentence summary of each chapter and see if that lays out a complete story. But to test the basic logic of your story, it's going to take someone else - especially if you write science fiction and fantasy. All those new terms, magic systems, governmental structures, and strange names have to make sense to the uninitiated and the author is just too buried in the world to see it from the outside.

So your self-editing endeavors are often best focused on the writing itself. To start, the more you know about editing (and writing) the better you'll be at it. So study up. Read some books from editors on editing, read some blog posts, follow editors on twitter. Listen when they talk about what they do and how they do it. One thing you'll find quickly is that despite their differences you'll hear a lot of the same things: use active voice when possible, show don't tell, eliminate redundancies, filler words, and cliches. In other words, follow the basic conventions of good writing. If you want to be a writer, you damn sure better know what those are.

So you know the rules, how do you apply that to your own work? A good way is to do it one piece at a time. Take a rule and edit your whole work focusing on that single thing. Maybe start with eliminating filler words (that, very), follow that with cutting filter words (looked, heard, felt), then maybe watch for sentence constructions to make sure you vary things up. If you try to do too many things at once they will all suffer, so spend the time necessary for each aspect. You'll not only pick up more mistakes, you'll learn to spot these as you write and likely will make fewer of them in the future.

Another way to switch your brain from story creator to grammar editor is to read the work backward. Going word by word will help pick out typos, but it misses a lot of grammar issues. I prefer to go sentence by sentence or sometimes paragraph by paragraph. It helps you avoid the automatic tendency to adjust the image of the words into the ideas (f*r 1nstanee, y0u c@n prbably reed th1s sent3nce juzt fime euen thouph its filld wilh mist*kes). In the editing process, you end up reading the same words dozens of times, so switching things up is essential.

Reading words aloud is another option. It's a different process for our brain to concentrate on pronunciation versus meaning, so we often catch more typos and missing/extra words. It also helps us hear what a reader hears in their brain coming upon new words, which can help find awkward constructions or poor word choices. It works to read it to yourself, but I prefer to find a willing audience - not only do I catch things as I say them, but I can also gauge their reactions (or comments) to get even more feedback. Which brings me to the next editing method:

Editing from friends

Even professional editors will generally have someone else check over their work. Like I said, no matter what tricks you use you'll never be able to completely separate yourself from your own writing. So what kind of friends can you get to help you with your editing? Almost anyone can be a useful editor as long as you know their strengths and don't expect too much.

Before we talk about different types of 'friends', let's distinguish between having someone help you out as opposed to paying a professional editor in your field. We'll get to the pros in a bit, but it's important to realize that if you're not paying someone to edit for you, you're not likely to get the same effort and results. Even if your friend is another writer, even if they have a degree in English Literature, what you get is feedback from a friend and not professional level editing. (Even if they are a professional editor it's unlikely they'll commit the same time and energy to helping someone for free that they would devote to a paying customer.)

Most often writers will turn to other writers for help. I've exchanged work with a number of different writers and gotten some very useful feedback. (A series of posts on critiquing starts here). Writers (at least the decent ones) should know the basics of writing and be able to apply them to your work with a more detached perspective than your own. Some of it will be personal preferences and stylistic choices, but writers tend to be good at catching regular patterns - do you overuse dialog tags? use the word 'just' too often? ask too many rhetorical questions?

With any editing, it's important to know how much to weight the feedback you receive, and exchanging works can help you judge another writer's strengths. Do they have elegant prose? If yes, then listen to their wording suggestions. But if you don't like something about their style (and we're all hypercritical and judgmental, so it's likely to happen), then take what they say with a grain of salt. You need to write with your own voice and be true to yourself.

The best way to get the feedback you want is to specifically ask for it. I know some writers who do great action scenes, so I'll ask them for feedback on mine. Some are really solid on grammar, so I'll ask for more proofreading from them. Others read a lot in my genre, so their take on themes and tropes is really important. As was true with self-editing, if you ask for everything from everyone, you're likely to get a shallow review of many things without the depth and detail that your writing deserves.

That goes for other friends you ask to read your work. I often use friends on family, but even there I ask for specifics. Some are avid readers, some have English degrees, some just have a good critical eye for typos. Genre readers are often great at developmental feedback though they might not know the terms or reasons. They just know it felt slow, or didn't make sense, or had too many vampires. It's up to you to take their vague responses and understand it means the pacing was slowed by too much backstory, the magic system has too many made up words in it, and your characterization is weak because of a lack of variety in voice.

If you do get some help from those who have some sort of training in writing or editing, most likely it's a different style. People who edit academic, business, or legal documents have a whole different way of looking at things. They are often good at catching problem areas, but there's a good chance their suggested fixes aren't what you want in a work of fiction.

The more feedback the better, with the caveat that you can't let it overwhelm you. Limit what you want from each person and take only what you need when they give it, and you'll be able to use it to improve your writing. Follow every piece of advice that comes your way and you'll end up with a hot mess. Accept your friends' help for what it is and use your own knowledge and skills to apply it and you'll be well on your way to a polished manuscript.

Professional Editing

Serious writers always get annoyed when random folk think they can write a book. Sure, anyone can write a book, but to write a good book, to weave a story and fill it with interesting and realistic characters, to keep the pace moving along, to create believable dialog, and do the million little things that make up a truly good book takes years of learning, practicing, and hard work to master. It's blithely insulting to assume that anyone can do it just as well as those who've dedicated themselves to the art. Same goes for editing.

While it's true that good writing is at the core of good editing, they are different skills and require different strengths and experiences. Not all great writers have what it takes to be a great editor - and vice versa. So if you want great editing, you're going to have to pay for it.

But keep in mind that giving someone money does not automatically guarantee a great result. Choose your editor carefully. A high school English teacher might edit a lot of work for their job, but that isn't the same as a fiction editor who works on books in the same genre as yours. Steampunk is very different from memoir, literary technique different from fantasy. All editing (and all editors) are not the same.

The best way to judge an editor is to judge their work. Find out what books they've edited. Read them. Do understand that a book is still the product of an author, so even the best editor can't turn crap into gold, but they should be able to smooth it out quite a bit and take the edge off the stink. So read several books and make sure that their style is something you want for your own, that their standards seem to be at the level you want.

Another good way to get a feel for their editing is to have them edit a sample of your work. Some will do this for free, but even if you have to pay it can be best to pay for a smaller chunk to start with before committing to the whole thing. It can save everyone time and you some money.

And money is an important consideration. I do believe that professional editing is the best, but it's not always worth it. If you're submitting a book to an agent or publisher, you shouldn't have to pay for editing - that's something that comes later. If you're self-publishing, there's a cost-benefit analysis that needs to be done. It's not worth paying a couple thousand dollars to edit a book that realistically is only going to sell a few hundred copies (which is all most books do sell). Paying for editing is an investment with risk, so make sure you can afford to lose that money and take that risk before plopping down your hard-earned bills.

Conclusion

I do want to add that editing is not just an investment in that single book. All editing, especially the professional kind, is an investment in your writing. If you really study the feedback you're given and take the time to not only make corrections but understand the cause of your mistake, you will improve your writing. And to me, that's what makes a writer - someone who not only keeps writing but works to improve and become a better writer. Editing is essential to that process, in any and all forms. Find the path that works for you and your story, and never stop moving forward.